victim mentality is donkey shit

i found out today that my stolen money has been restored to me thanks to some insurance the bank has against this sort of thing. funny part was that when i discovered this, my heart sank momentarily. i have deduced that this means one of two things about me: Either I have a bit of anarchist in me who pulls for the poor, clever thief (never mind that this thief made more in a weekend than i've made in my life)(i know this to be true, the bank told me about it)(yeah i know it was probably "thieves" plural) taking down the "man" (who i guess is me if i have an entire thousand dollars in one account) or I relish the idea of being a victim. If it is the later, Then I either relish it because i assume that if this bad shit is happening and it's only losing some money, then real bad shit is not coming my way in its stead (its the whole karma argument) or it means that i like feeling like a victim. Why? maybe so I have something tangible to complain about rather than just, like, being lonely or even general sadness. I mean, the I'm sad because i'm sad complaint gets old early. like 11th grade if you use it a lot (i know this for a fact). Or perhaps I liked it because it got a small amount of attention which is always good. I could be all like "look at me! my money got took and i dont even mind! i walk the walk! Shiiiit!". Unfortunately Theresa lost some money the week before so my story wasn't really that cool at all. Thanks Theresa. Anyway, if i have to tell you what i think it really was or if you don't know yourself then....you should call me up and we should hang out.... Really though, I guess it's a soup of all of the above. I'd like to think it's a nice vegetable soup like at the C&O. Evenly mixed and hearty. It's probably more like tomato soup from Cafe Europa, though. The tomatoes are the shitty, self-centered parts, and that bit of basil in it is the cool part about anarchism. Before you go thinking I'm a fucking ass though, (i am) i'll tell you this: I'd give all that thousand bucks back if the US would officially apologize to all the countries they've sent Condoleeza Rice to talk down to in the past few months. I mean seriously, that bit about making a new middle east? Goddamn. If you dont see what I'm saying, here's a parable (yes, a parable, fuck you). So, you and your friend are trying to put a new carburator in your '63 Thunderbird in the front yard. You're a little stuck on how to go about it but, you know, you've got a Haynes manual (for those of you who dont do a lot of auto work, these are about as useful as a receipt from hardee's when it comes to figurin' out how to fix a car. actually less useful. if you had a receipt from hardee's, that might imply that you were the sort who would know how to do this operation without a manual. anyway, sorry). Then along comes this dog. It starts barkin' and growlin' and then it begins to speak.(i know, bear with me). Dog says:"yo, i see you's guys dont know what you're doing. (he's a new york italian dog it seems) I tell you what. Take that carberator and piss on it and then throw it over that fence". So, you know, you do it of course (it's a goddamned TALKING DOG!). Then the dog bites you each in the leg and grows at you. Then it walks away. So you're like "hey! What the fuck!?!" And dog just sort of shrugs and growls and keeps on going and you're left with your carburator pissed on and on the other side of a fence (in the original version of the parable the dog was a lawyer or preacher or other know-it-all but these had too many redeeming qualities) (and now i know all of you are gonna say "Shit, Mike, I think dogs are swell! Dogs are way cooler than Lawyers! Do you hate animals? You are an ass! so here's the crux: the dog has rabies and steals babies from homes so he can eat them.) (yes. see. that dog is Condoleeza Rice). So, you know, to all you countries who Condo's busy setting straight on my behalf, I'm sorry. You can have my thousand bucks now. Just, you know. Call me or whatever.